Wunderland Kalkar

The staff were rude. The all inclusive package was subjective to when they chose to turn on the drinks dispensers. If they saw you using them they would turn them off. They didn’t have a snack bar as advertised. They put out sweets for one day and then removed them. The rooms were less than basic and very depressing, however probably in-keeping with the strange marketing strategy they are rolling with it being an ex nuclear power station. I don’t understand why people work in hospitality when they don’t have an ounce of hospitality in them whatsoever. Absolutely disgraceful place. Stay at your own risk. Thank god for the Prosecco! It’s the only thing that got me through the weekend there.

Worst place I have every had the displeasure of staying. Rude staff who abuse children and shout in their faces, room stinks and the bathrooms are dirty! Absolute rip off and would not recommend to anyone.

This is quite a difficult place to review; the hotel is designed for a very specific purpose. Guests taking a vacation within the Wunderland Theme Park, or maybe guests like me attending a conference with 450 delegates on an all-inclusive deal. The hotel seems designed to cater for a mass market, accommodation for the masses, feeding for the masses and facilities for the masses. And it does that very well, but you do get what you pay for. OK, some details from top to bottom. Location. Well, it's situated in a never commissioned nuclear power station on the left bank of the River Rhine. That makes it easy to find as it's huge! You can't really hide a cooling tower and massive concrete edifice. Parking was straightforward enough, though I have no idea if it can cope with the busiest times. Check-in was a little strange. Firstly through an outer reception to check on the booking, before given directions to an inner reception to exchange credit card details for a room key. So off to my room, in Rosalie Block, all part of the power station buildings. The rooms are purely functional, comfortable enough but definitely no-frills. Really reflected the era in which they were constructed, and I'm pretty sure never updated. Reasonable amount of storage space, desk, chair and two beds as I was in a twin room. The lighting was pretty dull though, a bit difficult to read by. Oh, and a TV, pretty small and mounted nearly at the top of the wall! The bedding was a bit thin, again definitely functional. The bathroom, again functional. I'm always disappointed to discover a sink with no plugs, a real pet hate. So take a plug. And take your own soap / shower gel / shampoo. The stuff in the dispensers was so dilute (a sort of foam) it was ineffective. But the shower was hot. Back into the main reception area, which is the main building. A labyrinth of rooms, sitting areas, actually pretty comfortable too. Lots of coffee machines and juice dispensers too. There's lots of other rooms, conference facilities, the Kids'Club etc etc off here, it is I guess the social hub of the vacation. And at the far end is the restaurant. I was genuinely impressed with the ability to mass feed so many people from the buffet, without too much queuing or stuff running out. It really is quite a major operation. I ate three meals per day for the three days I was there. The menu didn't seem to change much, and much of the food obviously comes from mass catering companies; I can just picture the huge tins of vegetables or fruit in syrup that must arrive on a daily purpose. But I guess it works! There's soda on tap, coffee from the machine and beer from the bar. You can't complain; it's exactly what it purports to be and is actually very good value, though it did remind me of my school dinners. Now I did see an A La Carte restaurant, but it wasn't open so can't really comment. I wouldn't stay here again through choice; I don't see myself taking a theme park